For the Love of the Game???

My mama-bear instincts are at full throttle.  I’m feeling so sad for our Kate as she had such an amazing weekend of soccer and her team went all the way to the championship game by playing so, so well.  It even ended the way she would hope with her team winning a hard-fought match to win 2-1.  What didn’t go so well was the shove she took from behind from an opposing player with less than 10 minutes left in the game.  This type of behavior had gone all during the duration of the game and went unchecked.  If I said it once, I said it 10 times that I didn’t care who won that game, I was just praying we could walk away from it with none of our girls injured.  Fast forward the the last 10 minutes and Kate being shoved down…she went down hard on her knee and didn’t get up.  Naturally I was sick, praying she hadn’t hit her head.  She did get up, but she was wobbly.  She tried to play through it, but after just a couple minutes, she knew she couldn’t and she signaled her coach that she needed to be pulled out.  That’s when I knew it was bad.  When the game was over, she hobbled over and shared that it was her knee.  She said it popped when she went down and it just didn’t “feel right.”  We iced it for a bit as we drove the many miles home and sent her to bed with prayers that a restful night’s sleep would be all the healing she would need.  We weren’t so lucky.  An appointment at the Orthopedic Clinic today revealed that she does, indeed, have an ACL injury.  The extent of that injury remains to be seen.  We will know more once the doctor has read the results of the MRI and she is seen again on Thursday morning.  Whatever it is, she will be okay.  It will all be okay.  Life is so much more than soccer.  She is sad and we are sad for her at the thought of her missing out on something she loves so much.  It is such a shame.  But it is more than a shame.

We went through this a few short weeks ago with Nick with his wrist, and now here we are with Kate's knee.  Neither injury needed to happen...both were the result of dirty playing that went unchecked by officials on the field and that was supported by coaches on the sideline.  I am under no illusion that our kids do not run the risk of getting hurt when they choose to play sports.  That is reality.  And if they get hurt in the normal course of play, then we accept that as part of their path.  When they get hurt because someone has been taught not to follow the rules and plays with an utter lack of sportsmanship, then that is another story altogether.  I just feel sad about the state of athletics for our children anymore...so much pressure put on so many kids to win at all costs.  I refuse to believe that children would intentionally hurt other children for the sake of a win for them...but when they have been taught that they only have value if they win, they will do that in whatever fashion they need to.  It is so sad, and not just for the sake of the kids who get hurt….it is sad for the sake of the kids doing the hurting, too.  

I have to wonder how we got here.  How did we get to a place where our children’s endeavors became more about us and what WE want and less about them and WHO they are?  I spent the weekend listening to parents say some pretty horrible things…expecting perfection out of children, criticizing choices the girls were making on the field, screaming at the officials, shouting directions to the girls on the field.  It was actually more than I could take a few different times and I found myself strategically placing my chair at a distance from everyone, just to try to avoid hearing it all.  It’s not right…and it is happening more and more and more.  I have never understood people’s belief that they have the right to critique, condemn, and criticize kids who are playing sports.  How is it that all of these people, most of whom never played a minute of the sport they are evaluating, believe they have all the answers and anything less than total compliance with their vision of play is a failure and they then have the right to judge and shout?  And how is it that all of these people do not understand that when they do this, they send the message to their children that anything less than winning makes them a failure?  That’s what is happening to our children…they must cheat, they must play with no sportsmanship, and they must do whatever it takes.  All for the sake of the win.   I feel sorry for the girl who did this to my Kate, just like I feel sorry for the boy who hurt my Nick.  Because my kids got hurt but they had parents who told them it would be okay and that they are not what they do.  My guess is those other kids don’t have that.  And that is sad.  I’m praying for a revolution…something that causes us all to stop and take stock of the messages we are sending our kids.  Something that makes us rock back on our heels and realize that this is not how God intends for our children’s lives to be…they are not meant to be pushed this hard and they are not meant to have so  much expected of them.  They are meant to follow the path God has laid out for them, and I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news for all those parents, but God does not have a path of Olympic athleticism or professional sports careers in store for all these kids.  Not even a little bit.